People Are People, So Why Should It Be, You and I Should Get Along So Awfully?

Alright, it's been a couple of days since the Kickstarter snafu. I posted a bit on it on my Facebook.

I have decided that since social acumen can be built just as a bicep or a career can, I might as well talk a bit about it.

A lot of his statements sound creepy when taken out of context. Everyone can sound like a jerk or an asshole or a creep out of context.  Quoting without context is the new lying. It's easy to spin statements into full-on misogyny.  And it's easier to than ever since we record everything.

I'm not defending Ken. To be clear I think there is good pickup and bad pickup. I haven't placed Ken yet because I haven't read all of his series.

I figure, since people are clamoring for his guide (as evidenced by the money her received) I might as well help lonely men out.

Ladies, the rest of this is directed at men. Not that you can't use it.

Alright. The secret to gaining social acumen and getting a girl

1) Approach everybody
2) Amplify good moods/fun

That's pretty much it.
I have a friend who suggests that men do not approach women for 2 years. I disagree. I think that this doesn't solve the fundamental problem nerds and geeks have.

And that problem is we never learned to talk to people like people. And we never learned to talk to women like people, either.

Yup. talking to women as if they are actual people. The mind reels at it's simplicity.

Women are people too. They have wants, needs, insecurities.  They have bad days.
A woman sitting on the train after work does not want to be hit on. She does, however, want to have a pleasant ride home.

Is your conversation going to make her time more pleasant?

I hate to say this, but for a lot of us geek, wanna-be-Casanovas, the answer is no.

You have to learn small talk. You have to learn how to casually start conversations. You have to learn to "play it smooth., so to speak.

And the only way to do that is to talk to anybody about anything.
So talk to men, women. At a bus stop, talk to the people. On the bus, chat up your neighbor.  Chat up men and women. That's important. You are learning to hold casual conversation, to be comfortable reacting to and engaging people.

You are not learning to pick up women. The days of routines and rote actions has sailed my friends, you have to improve you now.

Now, our first 100 or so conversations may be awkward.  So what. Michael Jordan was not the best player when he started at 14.  Just keep learning how to talk to people, and eventually you'll be ready for the next step.

If people want to hear more, I'll focus more on how to hold casual conversation. If that goes well, we can talk about flirting.

But for now, your Mr. Miyagi of love says: Talk to 10 people a day, for 30 seconds. Talk about the weather, the game, whatever. Hell, if that's too hard, just go up to 10 random people and say hi and walk away.

I could talk forever on this subject. Maybe Next post will be a FAQ of common arguments against talking to people.