The Keys to Creativity

Today I was blessed to get some peace and quiet. It was surprising to me what a difference having some quiet time - actual quiet time- made in creativity. It inspired me, frankly, to was polemic on the subject.

I haven't posted anything substantial in a while, and my environment is why. Creativity needs several things to grow. Luckily these things can be cultivated and fostered. The most creative have adroitly done so. Creativity is a skill, then, and not a talent. Everybody is a "Creative", some people have simply spent longer learning the skill

So here's the 3 things necessary for a creative mind. 

1) Environment
This may seem obvious, but it's easy to forget. Creatives need a place to work without distraction.

 My friend DuWayne hasn't updated his blog in quite a while. "I have no topics" he confesses. He ios trying to write a song and record it, but the song was slow in coming. He has plenty of topics, and he found a solution to the puzzle of his song.  That solution came when he was able to remove distractions. Likewise, he has topics buried inside, but anytime he has a moment to think, he's being tasked with some duty from the outside world.

I found similarly. Whenever I am trying to work, I find my environment not conducive to it at all. Beggars can't be choosers, my friends, but I have to admit that my housemates cannot do anything at a low volume. Between the low frequency mumbling, rattling, and stomping of one, and the loud helter-skelter of the television watched by the other,  it's difficult. 
I imagine every Creative needs a place free of the chaos of the world.  A study or studio that they can work in.

Perhaps I am just projecting.
The environment need not be empty. My thought room would be very sparse - chair and desk and perhaps a picture. However,  a professor of mine has books stacked upon books, and a my dad's study is a maze of shelves, desks, and tight spaces.  The idea here is the environment must not distract the Creative.


2) Peace
This sort of dovetails nicely with the first. A creative environment starts with peace - but it is different. Peace is basically a private space without distraction plus time.

About 6 years (almost exactly - January 2008), I worked at The Franz Group and had nothing to do for a week. We had no sales calls to make (and I was not a hustler). So I listened to self help tapes and read.
One of the Gurus - I can't remember which one, mentioned that in order to work properly he needed to rest for 30 minutes. He would mediate - he called it sitting in a chair, but it was meditation.  He would sit in his chair and let his mind wander.

Many Creatives take walks with alarming regularity. Kant walked with so regularity that they named his path "The Philosophers Walk".  Kyoto also has a Philosopher Walk. Many artists walked.

Just as you have your best ideas in the shower, flow comes when you are able to relax. Ideas will flow easily when your mind is at peace.

Peace is Environment + Time. And Solitude is Peace + Environment.

3) Play

This one is often forgotten by most Adults.  Kids seem to get this. It's the only thing that I will give kids. Otherwise they need to get off my lawn.

Creatives need to understand affordance. Creativity is blessing. We see a book, or we see an artist, or we see a dancer and we say they are creative. The truth is, the written page is a technique. The brush stroke is a technique. the step a technique. A skill. Most people may grudging accept this while saying "I can't do it." What they think they can't do is be creative. To compose.

Creativity is a skill, however.

A writer revises to practice writing. An artist will sketch to practice shape and proportion. A dancer  or an actor will rehearse to practice the technique.

With me so far? Awesome.

Play is the skill of composition and creativity.  It's about putting things together than don't normally do so.

A colander becomes a hat. A splash of water on paper becomes the image of a dragon or a beast. A pile of leaves becomes a crown. 

Affordance is defined as a quality of an object or an environment. A chair's most obvious use is to be sat on.  When children in church (as I was, occasionally) they are told to sit silently. If they tried to stand, they might  be told "We sit in chairs."

Church is serious business folks. It is not play.

But do we sit in chairs? A chair to a child can be a table, a step. It can be a cliff from which toy soldiers leap. To a teen it can be an statement, turned around and leaned on in casual rebellion.

When we play we create affordance and break away from what we see. We deny the obvious and ordinary in trade for the subtle, the lateral, the vertical, the possible, impossible. We turn trees into Treants and we re-card the discarded.

Play allows us to take things that don't belong together and make them fit. It is the practice of creativity. When we play - or dream, or let your mind wander - a form of mental play,  we discover connections that we may never have thought to use.

Long post, I am afraid. But there you have it. You want to be a Creative (ha, silly, you already are!), then the answer is simple. Find a place to be alone, take some time to relax, and maybe make a few "vroom vroom" noises.

Cheers, my kittens.  Stay dreamy. :D

Hopped up on Zinderthrust!*

Hello, folks.

This is probably going to be very stream-of-conscious. I make no apologies. I blame the latest promotion at McDonald's

I swear I am seeing triple. This is a terrible idea for a caffeine addict.  I think I've had about 7 gallons of the stuff. Tastes like absolute pisswater.* Rich Burlew writes about why a bad cup of coffee is good, because it reminds you of every great cup you've had. It's spot on. I am having flashbacks of flashbacks of Starbucks.

I am writing in triplicate all at once.  I said that. I am seeing triple.

The project continues, and continues to be above my pay grade. Yet I muddle on.

I had a bit I wanted to write about, but I forgot. I literally wrote an entire post in my head on the way home from McDonald's today, but then I blinked and it was gone. 

So a few observations on getting older:
I reached the age when a  good dump is often better than a good hump.
My father has reached the age where he actively gives a shit about how people separate their garbage.

I have yet to make a spelling error while typing this. That is unprecedented. I feel, aside from being extremely jittery, incredibly focused. As if, with the ingestion of copious amounts of coffee, I have found a physical and perceptual clarity.

I'm as loopy as a jaybird when I talk, blathering like a coked-up Robin Williams. But my sense, my hands, everything is moving with a sort of incredible, supernal grace. I think...

This leads me to suspect what others have told me, that I might have adult ADD. It would explain a whole bunch of variables.

This pretty much sums up McDonald's brilliant plan.

*Special thanks to Jon Walbrun for the name. 
**Note - It's actually pretty good. And free. So I can't really complain except for hyperbole. 

Jacob Grimm Meets Albert Camus

Sorry I haven't been in a posting mood. I have half a post written, but I'll probably break it up into three.

I've been feeling kind of down lately. Struggling with this big project.

So here's a comic:

A few days late.

Hey Kiddos. No new content this week, unfortunately.

I've been so damned busy with a new project or two that I haven't had time to update. It's literally driving me crazy.

In return, have a quick doodle I did whilst working on the first project. This has nothing to do with the second project.  It may have to do with the third.

Some news:

I'm now 250-255 lbs, that's down 45-50 lbs from April 7-12, when I started losing weight in earnest.

Ice cream tastes like ass thanks to low carb. It's way too sweet. .

I bought a car, so I may be able to mobo again. It's a small one/ That makes mobo more of a starry-eyed dream.


I will try to write about what independence really means. About how you too can walk away from things that don't advantage you. But for now, my digital tablet awaits.

Cheers

Is this the condition that I so feared?

My kiddos, I have a confession to make:

I never wanted to write about politics in this blog.

I never want to be political. I call myself an anarcho-moderate, and I am fanatically so. I had a rule

But I broke the rule and waxed political.

I waxed political because deep down this blog is about independence. The most important thing for man (or women!) is to have the liberty to live their life as they wish. To be free.

Free from illness by being healthy.
Free from hatred, ignorance and unhealthy agendas by keeping your mind open.
Free from mental illness through diet, exercise, reflection and meditation.
Free from drugs by being responsible for your body and mind.
And sometimes, free from a corrupt government (regardless of the party affiliation - from which you should also be free!).

Many people, and myself, often say we need something. And yet a lot of people get along without. I need a car, I need a gym, I need a job.

You don't. Your mind, your ingenuity, and your positivity are all you *need*. Everything else is optional or obtainable with those things.

I know, I sound like a raving hippy.

We are hooked - chained, to the world by needs and desires - for money, for love, for sex, for food, and those chains are being used to make you act in ways that maybe you don't want to act.

Well, there are two ways to release those chains. The first is to give everyone everything that they desire. If everyone is fulfilled, then there is no way to use fulfillment to motivate someone.  While I like this  option - because hay, free stuff, I think it's a dangerous option. There will always be something that is scarce - and that means something more valuable than another thing.

Plus it requires changing the world. That step's a-doozy.

The better solution is to reject those desires. Learn how little you actually need, so that you can  find what you really want. Reduce the value of something from the demand side, by simply not desiring it. This requires you to change yourself, but it's effects, if done by the commons as whole, will be immense.

The obvious and simple example is "I need a gym." Do you really need heavy equipment to get a workout, to become strong?  Smith racks, Leg Press machines, and thousand-dollar treadmills?

Not at all.  I have a gym membership. I do not need one.  All the equipment I really need is my body - and that's free.

I have spent about 45 dollars on exercise equipment that I use almost daily. It's cobbled together, grabbed from junk yards, and works better than the gym equipment. And Instead of a treadmill, I just go for a run.

To be free, you must remove things from your life, not add. Perhaps, like Diogenes, I see things as often a distraction.  Perhaps, like Seneca, I see us all working jobs we don't like for things we don't need.

So that's what this blog is about. Independence. It's a lot of work, kiddos, but it's worth it.

So my assignment for you is to take some time and remove yourself from a habit. I spent 5 weeks without Internet, and it was extremely productive. I advise you remove something - Internet, TV, even idle reading, if you are so inclined, and ask yourself as Seneca asks, "Is this the condition that I so feared?"

More on living as independently as possible next week, my friends.  

SHUT IT DOWN! SHUT IT ALL DOWN!

Alright, a couple of things today, my friends.

No political rant today, but just some rhetoric. I don't know much about the shutdown anyway.

So the government is shutting down, and all non-essential employees are getting a free day (without pay, which is lame) and all essential employees are sitting at there desks wishing they were getting paid.

Notice how the people who keep us safe, the people who create and guard our beauty, our memorials, who teach and who serve, are the ones getting shut down. And the people who make these silly rules and spend the money aren't hurt in the least by these shutdowns.

I do hate that the people who are tightening the belt aren't wearing the belt.

Here's a link to what some vets thought of closing down the WWII memorial park.  hint: They didn't think it well.

Why is this shutdown affecting people we need and want. Why don't we put a moratorium on say, the DEA. For the next week, smoke them if you got them. Or snort. or..inject, I guess, if that's your thing...

I wee bit of hyperbole, but the point stands. The people punished by this shutdown are the people who protect our homes, keep our parks, and send us mail.  Does that seem just to you? And I am not letting anyone off the hook here. Shutdown is the worst thing in the world, and there were alternatives. But both sides were playing whiny poo-poo head.

Seriously, our legislative and executive branches are acting like children who refuse to find a solution that both sides find acceptable, and then blaming each other for starting it.

We the people need to start being the adult in the room and send them to bed without supper.

OK, I guess this was a rant. Maybe I'll shutdown for the day.

Edit: Quick Update on the Dickery of th Feds:

The Washington Monument syndrome, also known as the Mount Rushmore Syndrome,^[1] or the firemen first principle,^[2][3] is a political tactic used in the United States by government agencies when faced with budget cuts. The tactic entails cutting the most visible or appreciated service provided by the government, from popular services such as national parks and libraries^[1] to valued public employees such as teachers and firefighters.^[2] This is done to gain support for tax increases that the public would otherwise be against. The name derives from the National Park Service's alleged habit of saying that any cuts would lead to an immediate closure of the wildly popular Washington

Monument.^[4] The National Review compare the tactic to hostage taking or blackmail.^[5]Although the strategy usually intends to highlight the government's value to voters, it can also be aimed at lawmakers themselves. Faced with budget cuts in the 1970s, Amtrak announced plans to cease train routes in the home districts of several members ofCongress.^[2]

The term was first used after George Hartzog, the seventh director of the National Park Service, closed popular national parks such as the Washington Monument and Grand Canyon National Park for two days a week in 1969. In response to complaints, Congress fired Hartzog and restored the funding.

Where the fight is fought

Such an epic title! Where the fight is fought, where the war is won! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL!

How I Imagine All Mecha Anime. 

Seriously, I wanted to get your attention, but the battle isn't some Frank Miller epic. 

History does show that eventually violence is the way to solve income disparity. The problem with "Guns, God, and Grenades" is that the wealthy can buy way more Guns, way more god, and many more grenades. 

So let's call violent insurrection plan D and see what else we can bring to the table. 

My solution to the wealth disparity is pretty straight forward. It's small business.

I know I am hearing groans from some my more socialist friends, but hear me out. You see, when we get upset about business, it's rarely the small business that we rage against. It's the Wal-marts and the targets and the Krafts. The huge corporations.  That's who we have a problem with. 

We never have a problem with the Yellow Bicycle Shops or The family Run Coffee shops or the Greek Diners. It's not the farmers at the Farmer's market who are the utter cockbites 

At least from a capitalist standpoint. As people, I hear anecdotal, some small business owners can be real dicks. 

It usually happens when a small or medium size business grows just so to put profit over people. A small business - say, a local bike shop, is run by people who love bikes, who live and breathe and talk bikes, and who hired people so in love with bikes that they hung around a bike shop until hired. 

I am talking about the Coffee shop owner who had a vision of a comfortable place with well made  locally-sourced food at a fair price. The type of coffee shop or diner restaurant where the owner is still in the kitchen, willing to come out and chat with the customer. 

Or the record store where the clerk is an elitist snob - who wouldn't be caught dead listening to "Now that's what I call Pop Vol 3784634739" but can rattle of the influence to Mars Volta (That's a band, right?)

This song is the cat's Meaow! It's sure to give the bluenose's the heebie-jeebies

These companies and people aren't making a mint, and while the bottom line is important, they have yet to reach the point where money is more important than quality of service, product and experience.

Passionate, grassroots capitalism is going to save our asses. I guarantee it.

Now, why we should be doubly mad. These companies are often under the same laws that larger companies are under. A rule for Wal-mart is a rule for Small businesses. What's worse, these small businesses don't have the money to fight these regulations. They have to follow the rules but aren't the rule makers. 

And if violence comes, guess which businesses get looted? The small ones. The ones that can't afford to get robbed or to pay for lawyers. 

Regulations and risks make it hard for small businesses today. As ever, your anarcho-moderate writer isn't suggesting pure deregulation. I am just hopping on the hipster bandwagon by saying small, local businesses, who care about the product only a little more than the bottom line, are how we are going to beat the wealthy. We put our money into those companies, and not into the Wal-marts and Palermo's.

So today, I say to you, gird up they loins with thy thin and spare wallet, and take your hard earned dollars (75 cents after inflation) and spend it locally as often as you can. 

. 

An Addendum (in the Vernacular)

Warning -Edited for clarity, and now fucking long as hell. Seriously, take kitten breaks.

Hello, my friends. I am particularly unfriendly today, and so I am once again using Written Kitten to keep my blood pressure from spiking. The last thing anyone needs is a blood vessel bursting and spraying my computer screen crimson.

Whew. Alright.  *click*

 *click*

Ok, so long-time reader Chris sent me this, a well-written and worded rebuttal to this, a adequately written argument about why Gen Y is unhappy.

Yes, in true contrarian-anarcho-moderate style, they are both fucking wrong.

I will start with the cheeky coward who hides behind a funny/procrastination website.

*click*  *click*

Shit, did I just lose an hour?

Wait but why says

To get to the bottom of why, we need to define what makes someone happy or unhappy in the first place. It comes down to a simple formula:

It's pretty straightforward -- when the reality of someone's life is better than they had expected, they're happy. When reality turns out to be worse than the expectations, they're unhappy."

And continues to say:

"With a smoother, more positive life experience than that of their own parents, Lucy's parents raised Lucy with a sense of optimism and unbounded possibility. And they weren't alone. Baby Boomers all around the country and world told their Gen Y kids that they could be whatever they wanted to be, instilling the special protagonist identity deep within their psyches.

This left GYPSYs feeling tremendously hopeful about their careers, to the point where their parents' goals of a green lawn of secure prosperity didn't really do it for them. A GYPSY-worthy lawn has flowers. "

 

Alright. I don't deny that "Gen Y" was set up with some pretty damn high expectations. I would liken them to the first immigrants. Streets were supposed to be paved with fucking gold, and we were promised robots. Robot sex maid robots.

Seriously. Where are my sex-maid-robots? Thanks Obama!

Anyway, then goes on to blame Gen Y

GYPSYs Are Wildly Ambitious

GYPSYs Are Delusional

 GYPSYs Are Taunted

And adds what is obvious to fucking everyone:

Unfortunately, the funny thing about the world is that it turns out to not be that easy of a place, and the weird thing about careers is that they're actually quite hard. Great careers take years of blood, sweat and tears to build -- even the ones with no flowers or unicorns on them -- and even the most successful people are rarely doing anything that great in their early or mid-20s.

But GYPSYs aren't about to just accept that.

Fuck you. Fuck your fucking face. Die ina  fire of pink slips. We accept this. We accept that hard work gets you ahead. We accept work.

We are the janitors, the barristas, as Hotel Clerks, and the anarcho-moderate bloggers.

That's how post recession Amercia worked. Asshole.

 Mr. Weinstein posts as much:

You have no idea about student debt, underemployment, life-long renting. “Stop feeling special” is some shitty advice. I don’t feel special or entitled, just poor. The only thing that makes me special is I have more ballooning debt than you. I’ve tempered the hell out of my expectations of work, ... I’m still poor and in debt and worked beyond the point where it can be managed with my health and my desire to actually see the son I’m helping to raise."

And he's right, we aren't entitled. Just poor.  We are busting ass.

Most of us who got shit degrees (like yours truly) understand, by now that they "done fucked up." Philosophy, gender Studies, English. If you ain't teaching, you ain't doing. And those with Education degrees might not be teaching either.

We know that companies want STEM degrees. if we didn't know then, we know now, for sure.

But, a friend of mine who has a MATH degree raises chickens because he can't get a job. The fuck?

Adam Weinstein touches on the issue, that \the promises of a high technology and better science has been an increase of productivity, but the consequences of that - more idle time and greater wealth, have been sucked up by the wealthy.

American workers have changed from generation to generation: Since 1979, the alleged Dawn of the Millennial, the average U.S. worker has endured a 75 percent increase in productivity...while real wages stayed flat.

The problem is: Long ago the government realized that as long as they said the right thing, they weren't accountable to the citizenry. And then doing the right thing became more expensive than making laws.  And distracting, imprisoning, and impoverishing the masses was cheaper than educating, liberating, and enriching them.
When the government no longer feared the masses, they just decided to follow the money.

And the poor folk don't have any.

Last weekend my baby had a fever, and we contemplated taking him to the ER, and my first thought was - had to be - “Oh God, that could wipe out our bank account! Maybe he can just ride it out?” Our status in this Big Financial Game had sucked my basic humanity towards my child away for a minute. If I wish for something better, is that me simply being entitled and delusional?

No it isn't. And yes, it is (see below)

Anyway, I'm ranting. I really just wanted to share Mr. Weinstein's blog post.

Weinstein says:

The latter maxim lurks in the heart of every critique of millennials. It assumes that if we're worse off than previous generations, the fault is ours, and our complaints are so much white whine.

He's not wrong. American's love their "Prosperity Movement" That with a little elbow grease, we can make it after all.

He continues to discuss how awesome it was for our parents:

They had room to advance and buy things. Yes, even the creatives. I once listened to a professor, who is in his sixties, read us the first published piece he'd been paid for, in the late 1970s. A thousand words or so. The rate, he says, was something like two bucks a word. That's four times what the Village Voice pays today, even for an award-winning investigative cover story. It's geometrically greater than what most writers can earn today writing daily brilliance for nationally renowned publications online. And writing daily brilliance, which many of them do, is hard goddamned work.

The economy post WWI was AWESOME. The BEST EVAR, actually. and that economy isn't here anymore.

 And my rebuttal, to all this naval gazing:

"So what?"

Reality doesn't care if you are poor. It doesn't care if have ER bills. it doesn't care if you are worried about a stroke but can't afford an ER visit (my version - I don't have a baby). It is on the side of the winner. Lower your expectations, or don't.

This is why, my kiddos, while I do not advocate violence (They have more bullets than us), I do advocate that you do your best to win. To make yourself a success. You're poor, you're fat, you're struggling and you want things.

Well, then go out and get them. This isn't a "suck-it-up" post. The truth is suck-it-up and bust ass only works when the other side is playing fair.  And the other side of the 99%, the 1%, is and always will be playing dirty fucking ball.

And the refs we elect to stop it are in their pockets.

So what is the solution?  Weinstein touches on it

Take the system that siphons off our capacities for human flourishing in hopes that we get thrown a little coin of the realm in return. Take that system and blow it up, you cowards.

Right now money is valuable, and so the 1% have learned what rules to make and change and follow to get as much as they can. And never did we slap their hand and tell them to get out of the bank and give back those properties.

We never learned, it seems, that wealth will make more wealth- for the wealthy. Trickle down economics could have been stopped by a cursory reading of history. If the cost to make wealth is too great, via regulation, inflation, or bureaucracy, then only the wealthy and criminal will make money.

I don't know kiddos. Somewhere along the lines the Aristocracy realized it didn't need to hide. We had been given enough rope of liberty and democracy to hang ourselves.

What we need to do is create value that cannot be taken. Value that can be traded. A new currency for a digital age. I'm not offering examples. It might not be enough to just have a new currency. It might have to be a new system.

We live in a unique place to do that. We have anonymity of the Internet, we have ways to create value from nothing, and more and More of us have nothing to fucking lose. We are career-less, jobless, and homeless. So fuck it. Reach for the fucking stars, assholes. What will happen? Lose your Mcjob? Hah! Go to jail? Free housing and a free (to you) Education. So paint on building walls and rant in the street.

We are not new yuppies. We are new hippies. We aren't changing the world for the better because we have luxury and a good post WWII economy, We are changing the world because we have nothing and therefore nothing to lose.

I needed to repeat that.  having nothing means you have nothing to lose. So go out and be a dreamsmith. Paint yourself fucking green. Steal from dumpsters, build gardens in empty parking lots. Shit.

So do what helps you, and if helps your fellow man, awesome. I hope it does. I hope we start building a world out of the junk the 1% let's us have. And it will be much cooler than manicured golf courses.

Alright, I need a kitten break, kiddos. Good luck, and do something fearless.

The Paradox of Wages (Walmart and Middle Class)

Hello, Friends!

I promised that I would write more polemics in the vernacular to which I am accustomed . Currently my job at The Mineshaft has me on an incredibly tight schedule. So expect at least one post a week.

Last week  I posted a maudlin mopey post. Don't read it, kiddos. I reeled on painkillers and bad training. My hands slapped, my ego bruised, and my morale spinning in the can from training. Made more in tips than my bitch of a trainer. That may be why she was so pissy.

I read this post the other day about raising the minimum wage. The argument from both sides can be summed up thus (Paraphrase):

Pro-wage-hike: More disposable income means more money to spend and more money through the sluices!
Anti-wage-hike: Suck my fat capitalist dick.

OK, that's not actually how the conversation goes. The wage hike supporters (towards which I lean) basically lean on one argument with two premises. More money in the hands of the average spender means more money over all, and it won't cost that much to raise wages.

This is common sense - a man (or woman) can only enjoy so many yachts, have so many parties, and so many "escorts". Eventually the amount they can spend dries up. Mostly   Jesus. How many zeros?*

This is true of the commoner too. I can only spend so much on blow before I have to slow down, take a pill (a different pill) chillax and let my heart rate get below 200.

But, I need to point out, there are a lot more of us, the commoner, than them, the wealthy. And those parties may benefit a few people. Maybe they have a hundred or a thousand servants, but that money doesn't go through he sluices as nicely as giving everybody working for large corporations a fat check.

I am not completely on board with government mandated wage increases. I am a friendly anarcho-moderate, and while the government has done some good things, a cumbersome juggernaut is she. So I am always cautious with regards to it's movements. But what else can we do? The corporations will be dickbags. Not even good business men, but actual shortsighted cuntnuggets.

I hate when we have to make laws to protect people from Dickbags, but see below.

Anti-wagers contend that this will cause businesses to offer less jobs, and fire people and generally continue to fuck up the economy like giant dickbags.  Truth is that most of the huge corporations could probably handled the loss in income. It's not that much. Sell a yacht or two.

This PDF happily explains what would happen with an increase to $12 an hour. Dick-all, really. Big corporations like Walmart and Target would not feel much of a pinch, nor would the consumer.
If wages increased 6 grand a year, but costs go up 1500 smackers similarly, that means the average consumer makes out to the tune of $4500 dollars a year.

Not too shabby. And according to these leftist folks there will be no affects on business. They also suggest rose-colored glasses, because they seem to forget the rule of business 101*.

BUT, my dear readers, this is all from progressive (pinko-commie) writers. Surely the conservative view can give us the "fair and balanced" style you expect from me.  So I did some research.

They say: Fuck you, worker. Dance for your dimes!
The third article above discusses it.
Some fuckwit named Mark Wilson  says that "fringe benefits" might be curtailed by a raised wage.

To him I ask: "What "fringe benefits?" Like, what benefits would be taken from someone? Insurance? Not fringe. Half-off burgers? Not a big deal for my last job. And most box stores don't give you that much of a discount.

Let's say Walmart gives you 10% off your own purchases. In order for you to make out the same as a wage hike (that hypothetical 4500 bucks) you'd need to spend 45 thousand dollars there in a year (while making, for those bad at math, an average wage of 15-20 grand a year). . At the Mineshaft I'd have to eat there for 1500 meals a year.

No wonder poor people have bad credit and are obese. Look how we have to spend and eat to take advantage of our fringe benefits.

Yeah, OK. keep your 25 dollar gas cards at Christmas, you petty jizzstains, I'll take the raise, thank you very much.

Math, Mr. Wilson. Either you do math or you fucking don't.**
I mean, are you fucking serious?

I can almost  -almost see the argument that Smaller businesses may have to fire employees. Well, most of them pay a little better than minimum, and can be more choosy. I agree that a higher wage will make better employees think about taking the job. God knows that some of my employers could have done better picking anyone else and paying them more.

Regarding the argument that these are "not meant to sustain a living wage." Newsflash, dickweasel, they are.  I never planned to be a cuss-spitting gonzo commentator, but there you fucking go. I never wanted to be on the side of more laws. I am. They are. The middle class isn't moving up. Old folks are staying in their jobs longer. So where's a poor dickhead kid gonna go?

Nowhere. We are going nowhere.

And finally, let's look at the free market. "Let the free market handle wages." Yeah. Let's Fucking Do That. Except that it's cheaper to buy a politician than produce a better product. Can't compete? Have Uncle Sam wag their finger at your opponent.

And don't get me started on cheap entertainment and expensive consumable goods. Christ. That's a great way to keep us down.

It's all shit, my friends. The song and dance of Walmart is just a mummer's show. They are spending more than they pay out to keep wages right where they are.

The rich are in bed with civil servants. Democracy is dead to the almighty dolla'. It's just aristocrats partying on top.

Do your best. And if you are one of those rich fucks at the top, remember, many of you didn't get there by yourself. You worked, sure, but you also had help. Mentors, friends, lucky breaks that made your work worthwhile.  Remember that. Mentor and befriend, and occasionally give in on fiscal policy.

Because as the French Nobility learned, it's awful hard to spend your money when you're dead.


* Dickbaggery.
** Yes, those numbers may be massaged.

A Good Fit..(Idle Morose Mobo Musings).

I happened to go back and reread this blog post.  I realize most of my readers already know, via various sources that I am no longer a Mobo. I am tenant, temporarily resigned to a couch in the middle of no-fuck-where.

Aside from cruising for spelling errors and typos, of which, there are many. I shall endeavor to not continue with errors. My hands yearn to be free of your bourgeois rules of spelling! Occupy my hands! Grammar is the tool of the one-percent!

Enough frivolity, my kids. Recently I have had a spat of bad luck Job-wise. Those who know me might ask me to edit the recently out of it.

Jobs and I do not get along.

Let's be honest. Jobs seem to have a problem. Jobs are demanding, tedious,a bore at parties, and until recently, not really good with the ladies. Jobs are dirty, smell of various substances, and are prone to become injurious.

Few people are besties with a job.

I myself wonder often if I am just not cut out for a job. If by some perfect storm of genetics, upbringing, and ill luck that leaves me less-than-qualified for most jobs.  I

I self-indulgently like to think that the Peter Principle has something to do with it, that I am so inept at the lower level jobs because I am meant to do a higher job. Perhaps that is true.

My current job, which is my...40th? since I started working at 14, has got me a little down, kiddos. I seem happier and more productive when I am unemployed. regardless, I have spent so much time under and un-employed that the one thing a job gets you (money) holds little appeal to me.

Somewhere, I imagine, when I close my eyes, there is a culture that exists wherein work is not nonsense jobs, but actual, worthwhile work. Perhaps a tribe that has yet to discover exploitative capitalism*


 I will be writing more on the subject of shit jobs and the shit that comes with them, but I have to go to bed.
.

*Exploitative, not enlightened...

Leadership (An Outsider's View)

Hello, Kiddos!

Hopefully I make a little more sense than my last post. Sorry, I was shaking off the rust. Today I want to discuss leadership. From the outside.

I say from the outside because I have never considered myself a leader. Even when I've lead, I don't consider myself a leader. I am just doing what I do. No worries and cheers, mate.

If I were describe my leadership style, I would call it Positively Absolutely Canadian.

"Eh."

I was a leader, I just didn't know it. And don't tell me. If I found I was actually responsible, I might have an attack of the vapors.

My dad always told me "Whoever among you who wants to be leader must be your servant." The quote comes from Matthew 20:26. I used to think "that's stupid. I thought that leaders lead. In this age of CEOs and inherited wealth (I'm looking at you Waltons!), it doesn't seem most leaders had to serve in the trenches. They blithely walk in and fire 10 thousand people.  Or they decide to bomb other countries.

Perhaps I ought not listen to Bad Religion while discussing Leaders of today.

Still, My Dad is not wrong. To lead requires service. But a little deconstruction is in order. because I think a lot of leaders have forgotten there job, and why their job is important.

A leader has served. That's why he is a leader. In order to lead effectively, you need to have spent years learning your craft, honing it, and leveraging that experience into success.  So here is how to be an effective leader, from someone who isn't.

A Leader is an Expert
I shall name 3 leaders off the top of my head.   John Taffer, Robert Irvine, and Gordon Ramsey. They are all on Television right now, but they are excellent examples because their fame should make them accessible.  What do they all have in common?

Years and years of service.  They didn't simply walk in to a restaurant, take over, and lead. They started out at the bottom. They didn't read a book and start spouting answers. They did hard work. They slogged in the trenches.  They made mistakes, as a cursory biography makes clear.

But their experience allows them to ask the right questions and to direct people to the best answers. A leader has screwed up, gone down cul-du-sacs, and hit the wall enough times to see things coming. If you have a problem or an idea that is, to put it bluntly, stupid, wouldn't it be nice to find someone who's been in that jam to help you out of it?

Education and Experience are the marks of an expert. And Expertise is the Mark of a leader.

A Leader Is Successful
We love losers. Sitcoms show us this. Movies show us this. Books and Comedians show this. We love a loser. But we don't respect a loser, and we don't follow one. We want proof that our leader has lead and his followers are successful.

Would you follow Custer into battle?.Heck no. Despite an excellent and admirable career, his spectacular failure and death give us pause.  His name is synonymous with failure.

What do you think about Pete Best? Who? Sometimes called "The 5th Beatle."  He has had a unimpressive successful career. But his success has not been meteoric, and few would care about his notions of music and the industry. I daresay, for the sake of hyperbole, he couldn't conduct a kids choir.*

We want to see proof of success. We all want to win, and so we want to follow winners.
A good concept is fantastic. A rousing speech, a handsome face, and a good feeling are all wonderful. But what real followers want - need, even, is to trust the leader will bring them a win.

I find it strange that people would challenge the ideas of Chef Ramsey, Chef Irvine, or Mr. Taffer. I have to presume it's for ratings. These men have awards, merits, and most important, money. Seems when they speak on their  topics, one would shut the fuck up and do as they tell.

Maybe it's me, I dunno.  I respect experts.

Success goes hand in hand with expertise - it is tangible, observable proof of  concept. An expert puts many more wins in the column than losses (But see below).

A person with no successes is a braggart or a liar (but see below)

A Leader Gets A Mentor (And Is One, Too)
A leader is part cheerleader, part director, part shepherd and part drill sergeant. It's cliched to say, but a leader's goal should be success. They may not seem to have your best interests at heart, but they have a vision and they want followers to successfully engage that vision.

I had a professor (several, actually) who encouraged and cajoled effort out of their students. The best were very nearly unsympathetic. They were hard on people, and harder on the people at the top. They did not embrace excuses. They had a vision of a student successfully professing as they profess - provided the student worked hard.

The best thing a would be leader can do is find another leader in his field. This allows you to use the mentor's expertise and learn how to lead. It's a one-two combo, and I cannot stress enough useful this is. Don't follow yours truly and treat your mentor's input lightly.

One last caveat. If your vision doesn't mesh with the leaders vision, you aren't doing yourself any favors, nor them. Likewise if your vision does not engage your followers, you need to change it or work with them.

A Leader Is A Failure Who's Hung On Long Enough. 
Anybody who's read inspirational quotes no doubt knows this gem from Michael Jordan 

I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

It may soothe the feelings of those without success, but the truth is a leader makes mistakes. When they steer a person away from a course of action, or make a decision, or ask a question, it's because they went there. They fucked up. And that fuck up stuck with them. And they want to spare their charges the same failure.

But it isn't merely self-aggrandizement of the mediocre. experience that teaches nothing is worthless. And so they dust themselves off, and try something else.


So that's it, kiddos. A leader is an expert with experience that helps guide people away from the same screw-ups they encountered.  To do this they had to start at the bottom, and serve and fail and learn.He who is to be master must first be a slave.

So go out, jump in at the bottom, and fail like you vote: Early and often!

The Written Word is Dead, man...

In my effort to inject maximum irony, I have decided to write another polemic on society. I'm not the first person to say it.

To quote a fiction I read once:

"The written word is dead. Dead as them little Egyptian pictures."

Now, gentle readers, are likely somewhat confused. Aren't I writing words and aren't you reading them?

Perhaps I should say the printed word is dead?  Hard copy is dead? But surely the written word is still here to stay.

Tell that to the newspapers, tell that to the libraries ditching books at sales and the used booksellers burning stock.

So if the written word isn't dead, it is in a coma. I like to think of it that way. I dream a dark dream of a futire where children while away hours in sensies and come across a dusty tome. They have no idea what it is, and, in a fit of pique, they do not immediately discard it. Instead, they take it to their great-uncle.

"What is it?" They ask in fleshspeak, annoyed, obviously, that their Gruncle didn't savvy a telepathy chip. Fleshspeak is so 2013. Slow, ungainly. Conversations *take minutes*.

"It's a book." I say, hoping that they can pay attention, and aren't simultaneously watching YouTube. "In it contains knowledge."

"How do you download it? is there a Usb4 slot? A link?"

"You don't" I chuckle."Not that way. you open it and read."

I demonstrate for them. A pico-nano-second of wonder appears on their faces before being replaced. by boredom again.

"What does this picture mean?" Says X-Hayden12

"That's the title." I say " The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn."

"What's it about?"

"Well," I start "It's about-"

"WikiVid says" interrupts Ninja-Davis "is a novel by Mark Twain, first published in England in December 1884 and in the United States in February 1885. Commonly named among the Great American Novels, the work is among the first in major American literature to be written throughout in vernacular English, characterized by local color regionalism. It is told in the first person by Huckleberry "Huck" Finn, a friend of Tom Sawyer and narrator of two other Twain novels (Tom Sawyer Abroad and Tom Sawyer, Detective). It is a direct sequel to The Adventures of Tom Sawyer."

"What - wait ,now"

"The book is noted for its colorful description of people and places along the Mississippi River. Satirizing a Southern antebellum society that had ceased to exist about twenty years before the work was published, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn is an often scathing look at entrenched attitudes, particularly racism."

I fume.

"Huh, sounds boring."

"Let's go play Diamond Age XII!"

But I digress. I love books. I am surrounded by them right now. But the modern world needs them less and less. And the jobs that need to be done need education less and less. The world values only a small group being educated, even though it benefits from education. 

I admit, lately, I have only read for pleasure. For [redacted] years I spent my time at the foot of words, and their pure knowledge. But that has left me devoid of practical knowledge or experience. 

I'm rambling today, my readers. I suppose I find it a great tragedy that books are no longer as important. That we read articles and watch YouTube and parrot that without thought. I loathe the pure consumer who views and does not contribute. I cringe at the Brave New world we live in, so inundated by information that it's hard to make heads or tails of it. I admire my friends who curl up with musty book by fire and candle light. And admire the ones who go out and write their story with actions.

I suppose this post is much ado about nothing, my friends. 

With Apologies to Steve Jackson, Marl Twain, Neil Stephenson, Aldous Huxley and The Bard of Avon.  

People Are People, So Why Should It Be, You and I Should Get Along So Awfully?

Alright, it's been a couple of days since the Kickstarter snafu. I posted a bit on it on my Facebook.

I have decided that since social acumen can be built just as a bicep or a career can, I might as well talk a bit about it.

A lot of his statements sound creepy when taken out of context. Everyone can sound like a jerk or an asshole or a creep out of context.  Quoting without context is the new lying. It's easy to spin statements into full-on misogyny.  And it's easier to than ever since we record everything.

I'm not defending Ken. To be clear I think there is good pickup and bad pickup. I haven't placed Ken yet because I haven't read all of his series.

I figure, since people are clamoring for his guide (as evidenced by the money her received) I might as well help lonely men out.

Ladies, the rest of this is directed at men. Not that you can't use it.

Alright. The secret to gaining social acumen and getting a girl

1) Approach everybody
2) Amplify good moods/fun

That's pretty much it.
I have a friend who suggests that men do not approach women for 2 years. I disagree. I think that this doesn't solve the fundamental problem nerds and geeks have.

And that problem is we never learned to talk to people like people. And we never learned to talk to women like people, either.

Yup. talking to women as if they are actual people. The mind reels at it's simplicity.

Women are people too. They have wants, needs, insecurities.  They have bad days.
A woman sitting on the train after work does not want to be hit on. She does, however, want to have a pleasant ride home.

Is your conversation going to make her time more pleasant?

I hate to say this, but for a lot of us geek, wanna-be-Casanovas, the answer is no.

You have to learn small talk. You have to learn how to casually start conversations. You have to learn to "play it smooth., so to speak.

And the only way to do that is to talk to anybody about anything.
So talk to men, women. At a bus stop, talk to the people. On the bus, chat up your neighbor.  Chat up men and women. That's important. You are learning to hold casual conversation, to be comfortable reacting to and engaging people.

You are not learning to pick up women. The days of routines and rote actions has sailed my friends, you have to improve you now.

Now, our first 100 or so conversations may be awkward.  So what. Michael Jordan was not the best player when he started at 14.  Just keep learning how to talk to people, and eventually you'll be ready for the next step.

If people want to hear more, I'll focus more on how to hold casual conversation. If that goes well, we can talk about flirting.

But for now, your Mr. Miyagi of love says: Talk to 10 people a day, for 30 seconds. Talk about the weather, the game, whatever. Hell, if that's too hard, just go up to 10 random people and say hi and walk away.

I could talk forever on this subject. Maybe Next post will be a FAQ of common arguments against talking to people.

In the early morning, with no place to go.

It's hot as hell where I am. Makes sleeping hard on a man. Went to bed at 2:30 and woke up at 4:30. Felt fine, really. I am sure I'll feel it later. But for now, i took the opportunity to apply for a job and look up getting a US passport. It's something I should have done long ago, but never bothered to. Let's be honest, kittens. Your narrator never thought he'd get a chance to travel outside the US.

Well, with this last application, it's entirely possible that where he is building what he is building will be built in another country.

While you parse that sentence, I shall continue.

So after applying I was full of pent up energy. I had not worked out on Saturday, being too sore and, well, too lazy, quite frankly. My legs were stiff and I was sweating like a pig a hippo in flannel. I figured it's better to sweat to burn calories. So I hopped on my bike and pedaled my fat ass to Starbucks to journal, draw and read.

Did I mention that my lappy and my car died? Then I got an abscess in my jaw.

I tell you, kittens. I have been keeping a right positive attitude. I may have tilted slightly this last week. Just a bit. a few manly tears may have been shed. Many curse words were said. My naturally Pollyanna attitude may have just slightly been shaken.

So now I have "upgraded" from a gas guzzling POS car to a fat guzzling bike. It's for the best. I have a lot of tummy to burn off.  About 294 thousand calories worth. I find numbers like that meaningless. So let's try this:
About 1730 cake pops. Yikes

As confections or cakes go, it's not bad. No fructose and no Hydrogenated oils. But I wouldn't recommend more than one a week.

Sunday mornings, by the by, are magical. The people are firndlier. The atmosphere calmer.

Finally, today's list:

Why MKE hates bicyclists

1) Few trails.
When I lived in Madison, I couldn't kick a n octogenarian hippy without tripping on a bike trail. You never had to take main roads to get anywhere. The Milwaukee sprawl dwarfs Madison, but I find that none of the trails direct me to the places I need to go. This is great when you want a leisurely bike ride. Not so good for getting to work.

2) Cars.
When I lived in Madison, I found the drivers to be somewhat sympathetic to my plight. I am on a vehicle that weighs in at around 30 lbs, huffing and puffing like an asthmatic corgi, with no external armor. Here, in MKE, it's a crap shoot. Some drivers will kindly pass with a wide birth. Some will zip by so closes as to brush your back hair, and some, I believe, will go out of their way to give you a love tap.

3)Weird hills.
OK, so Madison has hills, but they never seemed as bad as here. Except for Monroe street, most of the hills in Madison are short and sweet. Or I imagine they were.
Now, I don't really want to classify as a hill what amounts to a berm with delusions of grandeur, but it is graded as an incline for a mile.

I dunno, maybe I was in better shape in Madison, but fuck my tubby ass with an iron poker it was brutal.

Normally I would source my conclusions. This is not always useful to you, dear readers.

One last bit. Wish your dad a happy Father's Day. Unless he was a grade A dick. If his grade in Dickhead 101 was a B or less*, give him this one day, K? I normally don't like holidays. I must be getting sentimental in my dementia.

Cheers all.


*He'll never get his masters if he doesn't apply himself.

Beans, beans, They're good for your heart.

Quick update friends!

Food. We've taken care of the most important part of living in your car. That is Internet. Now we must tackle the next struggle. Food and water.

Right now, I have a modest income, so food is not quite the problem it will be in a few months. But without a kitchen, cooking becomes problematic.
 If well prepared for your adventure, you can purchase a camp stove or create a solar oven. Lacking the funds or the space for one, you are going to have to improvise.

If you are lucky, you'll have a friend like Jen who will let you use her kitchen.  Eating healthy becomes a little easier of you can grab some dry beans and maybe a little rice, drop it in a  slow cooker, and chow down 8 hours later. By Bean meal works out to 3 dollars a day and will keep you stupid full. It's healthy, vegan, and keeps your insulin from spiking - a plus for those of us with blood sugar issues.

Beans, my friend.. If you can eat them, bully for you. You win. No, it's not the fanciest of grub. But you gave up fancy when you gave up your address.

Now, things get trickier if you can't use a kitchen and don't have a way to cook.  You have to eat prepared foods. This can get expensive. And if you were made of money, you'd have that address.

Fast food is right out. Don't even think about it. it's poor nutritional value and excess calories will make you fat and tired. And bulking doesn't make it easier to sleep in your car.

Beans are your friend again, and so is Walmart. Is there anything these two can't accomplish (besides providing well-paying jobs)?

A bowl and a spoon and a 75 cent can of beans. If you make one meal of yours a can of pre-cooked beans, it will give you protein and fiber and keep you full. Avoid baked beans and go straight for the black beans. Add a little chili powder and voila!

Other things to eat are Deli meats, Pepperoni, and Sardines. When choosing prepared meats, make sure to keep your macros. Keto, for example, requires minimum protein, maximum carbohydrates, and some fat. You want to look for a solid calorie to price ratio. Spam, for example, is not that great for the price. Go for sardines instead. On slow carb, be careful how much sugar is in your foods. And don't be afraid to pick up a  bag of baby carrots on either. Yeah, they are high in sugar and carbs as vegetables go, but you cannot beat them for fullness factor. I also love raw broccoli and spinach. Just like dieting, continued fullness is important.   If you desire fruit, it's actually not that expensive to add an apple or a nectarine.

Eating prepped food will cost you between 5-10 dollars a day, depending on your dietary requirements. Avoid chips, candy, and prepared "junk food" snacks. They are actually not as inexpensive as you think, and they won't provide nutrition.


In the future we shall discuss visiting other cities, and busking. I spoke my friend JP, who's traveled this way, He speaks of the incredible generosity of people. I have experienced some of this, but I do not share his worldview. I have trouble asking for things (Which is 50% of getting things).  Hopefully I can break that limiting worldview and try something new.

Adventures of a Middle Class Mobo

Hello Again!

My plan was to write more often. I have not. Dear readers, I have done you a disservice. I throw myself upon my lappy! I prostrate myself for your forgiveness.

Or perhaps I just sip my large black coffee.

I have pushed my other projects back to tell you about my latest adventure. I am excited to say that I am a Mobile Hobo, or "Mobo". I confess that i do love that term. I cannot claim credit for it's invention. My friend Don told me it. No idea where he got it.

A Mobile hobo is a hobo who has a car. If we want to get pedantic, a hobo is a wandering worker, car or no. I am actually living the life of a tramp or a bum. Unfortunately, trying to combine "mobile" with tramp or bum makes me sound like a demented octogenarian tapioca junkie. M'tramp. M'bumramp. Tramampum...Mobum.

Trump? No. That would imply I have money to not look like a hobo, but still choose to for reasons of toupee.

Speaking of dressing up. My friend Jes (read her blog here) is a master fashionista.  She knows her stuff, and is a master deal finder. Want to look good on the cheap. She can help. She says I would look good in Taupe. I trust her. However, I find the name incredibly vulgar.

Taupe. Say it. Taupe.

So when I lose these last "few" (80) clinging pounds, I shall get something Taupe.

Back to the topic. I am a bum, at least temporarily. I shall go into my justifications in future blog posts, but for the time being I want to give a few first impressions.

1) Early to bed and early to rise, more or less.
I worked out hard yesterday.  I walked for an hour, then I did the Arc trainer, then I lifted. I was beat to hell. But I started at 10:30 pm and finished my post-workout shower around 2. Getting to bed that late normally isn't a problem. It usually takes me about a half an hour for me to get to sleep, more in the car. Suddenly it's 5:30 am and light's shining in. I don't want to get too much sun..So that means moving indoors. I got 3 hours of sleep last night.
I'm a little hinky

2) Walmart becomes your friend.
I slept in the parking lot of a local Walmart. The advantage of Walmart is the parking lot is huge. There are plenty of empty spaces to park in. You look exactly like any of the drones working. One person parked right next to me. they either didn't see me or didn't care. And more importantly, when morning comes you can head into the bathroom quickly and take care of business.

3) Kill the lights and put it in neutral...well..park, actually.
These are what will get to you. The lamps in a lot are pretty bright. This discourages crime, but makes sleeping difficult. I solved this by hanging blankets as makeshift curtains. It has the added effect of obscuring me from the curious.   Always hit the parking break

4) Internets
We cannot, in this day and age, live without our Cheezeburger Cats. Here is my cursory exploration of local internets.

Starbucks:  Internet Speed is good, but it's costly to sit there (about 3 bucks a day). Second best hours (6am to 10pm) and if you go late at night they sometimes give you food they would otherwise throw away.

McD's:   Where I write this. Only a dollar for a soda pop or a coffee. Sit all day. Longest hours (5:30 until Midnight). Internet is woefully slow. Especially if some douche-canoe is HOGGING ALL THE BANDWIDTH. I'M LOOKING AT YOU, KID WITH THE HEADPHONES! QUIT YOUR YOUTUBINATING AND STOP CLOGGING MY WEBPIPE!

Library: Shortest Hours (10am to 5pm). Comparable to Starbucks. Cheapest (FREE).

Any other locations that you know of? Send me a line.

5) It's not so bad.
As long as you have a moderate size car, you can sleep pretty well. I have to sleep sitting up - mostly because I normally sleep on my stomach, and until I get a van, that's not an option. So I just sit up on a bank of pillows and stretch my legs out. But it's cozy and so far I am lucky to have cool evenings, few insects, and zero . We shall see if this continues.

Well, that's it so far. If you liek this, then like it, or follow me. In the future I shall discuss other strategies for going "off grid". Most notably food and income.  How do you maintain a diet? Can you live on canned beans alone? Gluten free and Vegan options?

Also, I added to the list of books here

How to be happy: Get off the computer!

For those tuning in, I want to advise something. If you want to be happy, get off the computer.

Remember when the computer first appeared? It was going to revolutionize our lives. We were going to share information and research. We would link the wolrd and share culture.

Now all we do is look at cat pictures.

Social media like Facebook and Twitter have replaced conversations. I have to hold back on what I say on Facebook, lest I have this conversation.

Me: "Did I tell you I saw Iron Man 3 finally?"
FB Friend: "Yeah, saw it on Facebook."
Me: "I rather liked the part where <spoilers>."
FB Friend: "Yeah, I saw your tweet"
Me: "Oh."

That's it. It's worse in person. What do we talk about?
Well, I used Facebook for good, and not evil. I crowdsourced a list of books I am to read, both Classic Fiction and Non-Fiction.  The Art of Nonconformity suggests at least 30 of each. Well, I have nothing but time and a Library Card, so let's do this:

First 15 of each:

Non Fiction:
1. Conflicted leader
2. Defending the Crown
3. The Selfish Gene
4. The God Delusion
5. Guns Germs and Steel
6. "Surely You Are Joking, Mr. Feynman!"
7. Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers
8.  The People Who Eat Darkness
9. Hired Swords, the Rise of Private Warrior Power in Early Japan
10. Samurai, Warrior, and The State in Early Medieval Japan
11. The Teeth and Claws of the Buddha
12: The Vikings
13: The Vinland Sagas
14. The Signal and the Noise
15. Freakonomics

Fiction:
1. The Prose and Poetic Eddas
2. Egil's Saga
3. Dispair by  Nabokov
4. White Guard by Bulgakov
5. The Pigeon by Suskind
6. Fahrenheit 451
7. Count of Monte Cristo
8. Ivanhoe
9. The Brothers Karamazov
10.Watership Down
11. Anna Karenina
12. Voyage of the Beagle
13. Hojuki
14. The Tale of Heike
15. Dream of the Red Chamber

Thanks to Lorrie, Mike, Chris, Joe-Bear, Lynn, and the restof my literate friends. If a book you recommended isn't listed, then it is in the second part of the series, I have read it, or it's a Bronte sisters' book.
Now I shall take my own advice and get the hell off the computer!


EDIT:  I found a list of books I wanted to read. So I have added:

Fiction:
16. A Sport and Pastime
17. The Postman Always Rings twice
18. Tropic of Cancer
19. Revolutionary Road
20. As I Lay Dying
21. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
22-25. Factotem, Post Office, Ham on Rye and Women by C. Bukowski
26. Midnight's Children
27. Lolita
28. Underworld by DeLillo
30. CivalWarLand in Bad Decline

Non-Fiction
16. Hell's Angels by Hunter S. Thompson
17. Artful Sentences
18. Super Freakonomics.